Childish Dreams

"In the dreadful memory of my childhood, a little girl still roams,

Through rememberance of fourth grade,

past playground now turned to flash back mirrored catacombs.

I sought for ladybugs,

Hope lived in every step made,

While a boy’s cruel taunt shattered the solace I'd proudly laid.

“Ha, you're a loner!” he yelled from his plastic castle perch,

Hearing it my heart trembled and sank while I continued more despondant in my search,

I think too deeply and perpetually feel life’s edges so sharp,

Craving conversations that play like a soulful harp.

In adulthood’s shadow, I find it’s quite the same,

Seeking friendships that never feed my flame.

My husband, a galaxy among suns so holistic in his light,

The male exception in a world drenched in fight.

However friendship with women now I genually find joy, but bonds cease to grow,

Daily connections they all have the privilege to share, oh something I’ll never know.

Told that I want too much yet I silently agree,

And yearn for the friendships that elude me.

A lonely little girl within, seemingly forever searching under bright skies,

For ladybugs and some friends with overjoyed eyes."

-aubs

May, 15, 2024